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Wednesday, March 27, 2013


Yo Yo hey what up people.  My name is Greg. Maud has mentioned me occasionally in this blog. Often she refers to me as "G". ANYWAY I'm not vegan but I'd say I'm a "Hard Vegetarian" or something like that. Basically I eat cheese occasionally, but otherwise my diet is mostly of a vegan nature. That being said, day one of my two-part series of guest posts happens to feature only Vegan foods, and some debatable chapstick.
Here goes:
Breakfast: KASHI CINNAMON HARVEST. This is basically my breakfast every single day, except on my days off I add a banana. I tried eating oatmeal for a while but I wasn't pooping enough. This does the trick and is about as cheap.

Mid-morning snack: I call this one "Sorrowful orange". Have you ever seen an orange look so longingly out a window? I guess he knew his days were numbered. Soon after this photo was taken, I ate him.

This is the video game I played on the subway. It's called "Solatorobo" and it is about a fox that drives a robot and does tasks for people around town.

Lunch: Okay, here is where things get good. When invited to do this post, I immediately began to obsess over what I would eat. I didn't want to show you stuff that you've seen on here before. Luckily, being a little more culinarily adventurous than Maud is (I.e. willing to eat grease) I have a few more options when it comes to eating out. I wound up at MAMOUN's FALAFEL on St. Marks. This place makes a very good, cheap, no frills falafel, which I have had a hundred times. So this time I got a lentil soup and spinach pie. The best thing about this place is that all their menu items are around 2-3 dollars so you can mix and match a few of them, change it up,  and get something nice for your meal...

 ...WITH DESSERT: Mubrumeh. A lot like baklava but with a fancy pile of nuts on top. ALMONDS, WALNUTS, PISTACHIOS, on PHYLLO DOUGH, SOAKED IN HONEY. And I do mean SOAKED. Only costs 2.00.

A BRIEF WORD ABOUT NYC FALAFEL: I have tried my fair share of falafel, though I am no expert. If you spend a little bit of time in the area you will invariably hear MAMOUN'S being touted as "The best falafel in the city". You may have even read this in a guide book or something. This statement can be considered true on a misleading grammatical technicality. While mamoun's falafel is indeed worthy of such a claim, it can only be applied to the falafel itself, that is to say the falafel balls. As I said above, this is a cheap, no frills falafel and as such, the pita, iceberg lettuce, tahini and diced tomatoes included in the 3.00 falafel sandwich at Mamoun's do add up to something inarguably delicious, yet not at all worthy of "Best falafel" status. For a complete, gourmet, mind blowing, high-scoring-in-all-categories, lovingly designed and prepared to order, slightly more expensive falafel, those in the know go to Taim.

This is a NYC pigeon on its way to some very important pigeony business, not at all interested in hearing what I have to say about falafel.

This is a case of juice. Maud blogged about these the other day. I usually get the "Spicy Super Green." It has kale, cayenne etc.

Have you guys seen these tofu ads with a "Croods" promotional tie-in? Weird.

CHAPSTICK: It has beeswax in it. I have tried A LOT of different chapsticks, and most of them give me a rash around the corners of my mouth. Gross, right? IT IS GROSS. So I'm trying to figure out why that happens. My best guess is the beeswax.  The best brand of vegan chapstick I have been able to find is ecolips. I was using their lemon-lime and grape flavor for a while and no rash. Then I got a rash with the lemon-lime. Then I stopped using chapstick. Then I wound up buying this whole foods brand in a pinch and then wham! Insta-rash. So I am trying to pinpoint exactly what ingredient is causing this. Anyone else have this problem?

This is pizza from viva. Broccoli, Tomato, Onions, Mushroom, Sauce, on a C-R-U-S-T. (Spelt crust, get it?) Their pizza is good and vegan but they have a "B" sanitary grade.

And this is MAUD grabbing her bounteous cheeks. Isn't she a beaut?



  1. This is gonna make people not wanna eat food for 3 reasons: you mention pooping, rashmouth, and then show my face. Vomit town.

    1. Also that's not me who is that weirdo

    2. Now I think something is wrong with me because this post made me very hungry.

  2. Awesome guest post!!!
    I love that zataar pita thingy at mamaoun's as well as that lentil soup, agreed on Taim as the ultimate falafel but rainbow on 17th st is also awesome....
    The orange photo/title is hysterical.
    I would understand if maud started plotting revenge for that photo above!

  3. Love it! It's nice to have a good old dose of grease every now and then ;) Great pics, good looking food and good looking Maud! I can't wait to visit New York one day and try all the vegan food it has to offer; healthy and greasy :) I also agree that we need a pic of Greg now too!!

  4. Great post! I don't mind grease, but I checked out Mamoun's one day and couldn't do it; are they deep-fried or something? You're the second glowing recommendation of Taim so now I guess I really have to give it a try.

    As for lip balm, have you tried Crazy Rumors? It's my favorite even though they didn't accept my pictorial submission of my dog with a moustache for their moustachioed contest (dogs can have moustaches!). I've also heard good things about Hurraw, but haven't personally tried. Ultimately, I'm sure you can find a non-bee product to make your lips happy.

    And thanks for the shot of Maud; it will make it much easier to find her in a crowd so we can be socially awkward together in person rather than comfortable chatting in online settings.

  5. Oh man, do I ever miss NYC falafel. MAMOUN'S!! (I should probably shut it, because there is definitely good falafel in Silicon Valley, but still.)

  6. The dessert looks amazeballs - I'm not vegan so I can be all like "pass me the honey yo." :) Love the guest post, do more!

  7. I laughed aloud various times throughout this post. Not just at the gratuitous ALL CAPS COMMENTS. ;) Ha ha! Very witty.

    I'll be sure to try both the best and second best falafel on a visit to NYC.

    Hooray for lovely Maud! I always knew she was beautiful!

  8. Excellent post! Can you keep it up? (I mean posting regularly).

    Wish I could help you on the chapped lips thing. Just avoid products with Petroleum Jelly, that's all I know. Chapstick used to make my lips even more chapped. Then I bought a lifetime supply of 'Kiss My Face' Lip Balm at Big Lots and haven't had an issue since then.

    Other things I noted in this extravaganza of a post: That's a really big bite out of the Spinach Pie. Wish that dessert wasn't doused in Honey, cuz it is a hot mess. I am concerned for that pigeon's safety. People who are addicted to Meth tend to pick & pull on their face a lot. Just sayin....

  9. Hi Greg! Great post and I was especially excited to see a picture of Maud. I agree, she is beautiful!

    The sorrowful orange made me laugh. :)

    Have you tried Hurraw brand lip balm? That and Booda balms are probably the most pure ones out there.

    Lunch and the pizza look pretty damn good!

  10. What a great post!! Love the wit and humor peppered in there, such a fun read!! The spinach pie looks so good! Falafel is a fav but believe it or not I've never eaten it in the city. There is a place by work that has pretty good falafel but it is here on Long Island. Love the pigeon and the juice pic. LOVE the in focus (FINALLY!) pic of Maud! So cute!!! The pizza looks great too!

    I've had some pretty great success using Hurraw! lip balm. It works really well and I've never noticed any sort of rash? I get really dry cracked lips in the winter too and it is by far the best one I've tried. I was also gifted "The Merry Hempsters" lip balm over the holidays and it works pretty well. I'd recommend the peppermint, it's all tingly. The only thing is that it contains minute amounts of THC (Wtf?!) so if that bothers you I'd avoid it. I like Hurraw! the best.

  11. All oranges are sorrowful, because they are the devilfruit. Heck yeah that walnut pastry! I remember, as a kid, squooshing baklava as much as I could to suck all the honey out. Yeah, I was a pretty eater.

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  17. Yay Greg! I loved this post. It made me LOL at the coffee shop, and thus everyone thinks I am a weirdo. Win! It's funny because if my partner did a guest post he too would be able to feature things that you don't usually see on my blog due to his willingness to eat grease. Ah, man-stomachs of steel. (Not that I believe in the gender binary, or biological determinism, but there is admittedly a trend that some dudes can just handle more junk, non?).

    And I'm so glad to see your lovely face, Maude!

  18. I would frame the pic of the NYC pigeon strutting down the street — so funny! beeswax, propolis and/or jojoba oil can all cause liprash.

  19. Enjoying the guest posts! And the world gets to see our cute Maud. Is a Greg pic forthcoming?


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